2016 went by really quick. I was at Korea with my family for two weeks in February, SEA for 3 months during summer break and spent Christmas and New Years in UK and I'm done with 5 semesters with 1 more semester left to go.
2017 is going to be a pretty scary year for me. I'm really looking forward to see where I'll end up by the end of 2018 and hopefully, not in the same spot. It's the year that I will be graduating from my degree and I have to again, figure out where I'll be going from there. It took me a long while to figure out what I was going to do after SPM, and then A-Levels and I after this, it will be the end of my formal education if I don't continue masters.
I guess I would have never thought that I would be travelling so much during my degree life but I am so thankful for these past 3 years even though my CV is probably empty, I have gained so much more knowledge and self confidence that no internship would have helped me in.
It is definitely not travelling that does that to you, but the people you meet in between, how lonely it gets sometimes, or when you just don't and cannot connect with the backpackers you meet in a hostel, or no matter how hard you try to make friends but you're still not very comfortable or on days, you just don't feel like doing anything, or that you don't have your friends or family around you when you're sick or when you're in trouble, or on some days, you feel like you're on your own with no one to turn to, when you're sick, there's no one to depend on but yourself.
It is also all the food I get to try and how sometimes when you make a connection with someone and they tell you intimate stuff about themselves, how it made me teared because I feel so much more and I don't take connections like these for granted because it is hard for me to make a connection. Looking back, it was all the stupid mistakes I made that I really can laugh about it now. How I rode a scooter halfway to town only to realise there's no gas and no one around me understood or could understand that I need gas despite my actions trying to explain it ( one of the locals brought me to a police station lol). I also remember riding up to the mountains only to realise that I'm lost and it was drizzling and cold and I was wearing only a tank top and shorts and how a family invited me to their house for some hot drinks even though we don't speak any common language. The whole night it was just us talking with sign language and me showing them pictures of my travel and them being amazed and they brought out their photo albums and start showing me random pictures of... their family I would presume.
It is going to a country that speaks in a completely different language and trying to figure out how their public transportation works (Google Map is AWESOME), how they spend their days, what they usually eat, it is listening to their conversations in a completely alien language. There is just something about that that is so beautiful. It is about them showing their affection and care towards a stranger like me with a completely different language but a universal body language and tone.
It is about spending a month in a country and just taking my time to explore, to talk to the locals and experience what they experience in their country. It is them talking with pride about their local delicacies, about the beauty of their country.
It is all these that really puts a smile to my face. I feel like I grew every time I come back from a country because I learn so much more.
Things don't always go my way and I learn to be okay with it. I learn to be okay with not enjoying myself when I'm out. I learnt that it is okay to spend a whole day in bed in your hostel because I just didn't feel like doing anything. I learnt to ask for help when I need one. I learnt to approach people and try to make conversations when I feel lonely. I learnt that it is okay on days where I feel not okay.
All in all, I am really glad I have a home to go back to and my home is wherever my family is.
I've always admired people who have a clear vision or at least they know what they want to aim for in the future because I don't. It really scares me a bit to not know what lies ahead but as someone I care about deeply's favorite quote - " There is no experience but the present experience " .
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